According to www.urbandictionary.com the phrase or shall I say idiom “out of your league” means:
1. An expression used when a girl/guy is just too hot for you and you have no chance with her/him.
2. When you are in a situation where you have no chance of succeeding.
3. When someone is out of the class of people you are expected to date.
This phrase led me back to a chapter of a book I read a few years ago by Zane called Shame on it All. In that particular chapter the character Collette, who was a temp at a law firm met one of the firm’s major clients. His name was Lloyd. He was the owner of an online dating site. Their flirting led them to dinner and a rump in the back of his limousine. After that, they saw each other again and again but it always led to the bedroom. It’s seems like thing were moving along perfectly in Collette’s mind. She really wanted Lloyd to be her man and she thought he wanted her to be his woman. Then things took a turn for the worse when she thought he was going to escort her to his calendar party for his business. He told her he had no intentions of taking her to the party. Her response was that she assumed she was going since they were dating. That’s when he shared his feelings. The conversation went something like this:
Lloyd: Collette, we are f***ing, not dating. There is a difference.
Collette: Excuse me?
Lloyd: You’re a lot of fun, but as far as a real relationship, I need someone who is more umm……..
Collette: More what?
Lloyd: I knew I shouldn’t have done this……………Whenever I get involved with slutty women,they expect me to give them the world.
Collette: Are you trying to call me a slut?
Lloyd: I’m telling you straight up. Look at how we met.
Collette: We met at my job.
Lloyd: Yes, your job. A job is not the same thing as a career and I need a woman with a career.
Collette: F*** you! I’m leaving!
Lloyd: That’s probably for the best. No hard feelings. You don’t have a regular job and very little education. I’m a rising star and I need a woman who mirrors me in every way.
Collette: So what the hell were you doing with me in the first place?
Lloyd: Like I said before……..I was f***ing you. Pure and simple.
Needless to say, Collette left his house in tears. Was she wrong to want a well established, educated guy like Lloyd? Is it not possible for two different class of people to mesh? Basically, in a very cold and heartless way Lloyd told Collette, she was not in his league. She was however; good enough to sleep with. I know Lloyd is a jerk but the truth of the matter is that there are many people who think just like Lloyd. If they are of a certain status, they only want to have serious relationships with people who are on their level.. I’m not saying it’s right but that’s the way it is. I thought this was interesting because most of the time it’s the female that makes some men feel they are way out of their league. When you think it about, men usually try to pursue women they feel is within their reach. This is because of the fear of rejection. Back to Collette and Lloyd ………….Even though this story is fictional, it is so relevent and thought-provoking because I am almost certain someone has experienced this in real life.
Should Lloyd have been upfront about their relationship? Do you think Lloyd should have been a little nicer, perhaps more respectful? Was Collette wrong for assuming they were dating? Do you think Collette was good enough for Lloyd to date? Have you ever tried to date someone out of your league? Do you think someone being “in or out” of your league is a factor in dating?
Zane. “Truth Hurts.” Shame on it all. New York: Pocket Books, 2005. 318-320. Print.